I have a very good friend who for a few years now has been telling me all about her lack of privacy when she goes to the toilet. It’s not that she doesn’t have a toilet door. It’s that she has kids.

So for a while now Jaxon’s been joining me in the loo. It’s been good. Really. Or sort of ok. Well, just ok. I only have one child so maybe it’s that. My friend has three, and I imagine having three kids in the loo with you while you twiddle your thumbs is a bit much.

So far he’s got down on the ground and looked between my legs to see all the action. He’s pulled my pants out and had a good look (where’s the super-absorbent padding Mum? The microfibers?) He’s wandered in behind me and flushed the toilet while I’ve been sitting there. He’s pulled the toilet paper off the wall, and he’s slammed the lid down on my ass as I sat there. It’s all good. I can cope with that.

All of this I could sort of just look past. It was cute. Sort of.  What on earth is my friend complaining about?

But today, when  he came dashing around the corner and spotted me on the loo and immediately started yelling out “Go! Go! Go! Go!” I was a little freaked out.

A wet ass I can cope with…but being cheered on from the side lines?

Hmm.