Jaxon-ism’s #11,746

So Jaxon plays this stupid game called Five Nights at Freddy’s. Today I told him that when I was growing up we had a Freddy and he was much scarier than anything from his FNAF’s. Jaxon disagrees with me and the competetive in me just wants to sit him down one night to watch A Nightmare on Elm Street. That’d show him!

Tim says this could be child abuse. But one day Jaxon. One day you and I have a date!

Jaxon-ism’s #65,768

When I was five my Mum took me to the dentist to get a hole filled. I “apparently” kicked, screamed, yelled and cried. I “apparently” screamed at the dentist that ‘My Mum wont let you hurt me! Get away from me!’


Today Jaxon had his eyes tested by orthopedics at The Royal Childrens Hospital. He needed eye drops. And he kicked and screamed and yelled at him to get away from him. For half an hour he screamed at the top of his lungs ‘I wont do it. EVER!!! I don’t want to. No! No! I’m not doing it’ In the end the head eye specialist came in, wrestled Jaxon to the bed while I held his legs and put the drops in. Waahh wahhh waah!

Anyway. That was my day. I don’t know where he gets it from.

Dexter-isms #10,233

Today was the most horrible day in terms of weather. So when Dexter and I got to school to pick Jaxon up we waited in the car as long as possible to go in to the yard. It was blowing a gale and raining.

We sat there conversing. Dexter is curious about being born and asked if he was in my tummy, did he kick his way out?

I said no, the Doctor had to cut me (showed him where) and take him out and then the Doctor had to sew me back up.

He asked if it hurt and I answered, it hurt me, but not you.

Then he looked over at me and said “That’s really gross Mum”

Hide and Seek

He doesn’t eat them. He just moves them around. Only my shoes mostly. I can’t tell you how many mornings I have gone to put my shoes on only to find that one is missing. Having to ask the dog where your other shoe is when you really need it to go out is no laughing matter!



This is my first go at a portrait painting. Obviously, it’s my Dad. It’s not finished, but he has it and has framed it. I love this painting. It may not be finished and it may have it’s faults but…it is such a great likeness to him. I would like to try it again, I have learned a few more things since doing this.

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Jaxon having his MRI to see if his neck needs surgery.

The theory being that it’s possible that one side of his neck is growing while the other fused side is not. They will compare these scans to scans they took last year to find out.

20140923_151308Tim is jealous because Jaxon gets a TV at the end of his bed. There is a mirror above his head and he’s watching a movie. No such special treatment for poor old Tim.


The Park

20140824_115848 20140824_121243All of the parks that we frequent have special names. We got to one called The Eiffel Tower” because it has a big climbing thing that looks like it.

This park is called “The Blue Park” because all of the equipment is blue. But Tim and I call it “The Windy Park” because there could be not a breath of wind at home and it’s blowing a gale at this park just a few kilometers away.


For *my* birthday this year we decided to take the kids to Monster Jam. Our Saturday nights have been a treat for them lately, getting to stay up late to watch it with us. By late I mean, like a full half an hour past bed time. But they didn’t know that!

The day was awesome. Though Jaxon was a crank for the first bit of getting to see the trucks up close and personal.

See that child smiling in the photo? Yep, not mine! Some other lucky parents had a kid who was delighted to be taken to something so BIG!

20141004_120148The day improved once we got to our seats. Kids cheered up. 

20141004_125731 20141004_133037 20141004_134407The trucks did not fail to deliver a show.

20141004_125328 20141004_140834 20141004_143451 20141004_152636 20141004_154210 20141004_155037This last one was a back flip that we’d been waiting for all day. It happened so fast that we nearly missed it!

The between show of stunt bikes was far more exciting I think. The next big thing we take them to will probably have to involve those.

Pussy in a Pot

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I’d love to say that the cat is a genius and is sitting in this pot to keep warm in the sun. But in all likely hood, he’s sitting in this pot planning the mass destruction of the local sparrows.

In the last few weeks he has gone from never catching a thing, other than the odd moth, to bringing in all kinds of things. Amoung them, two pigeons, two canaries, two budgies and a starling.

The bell’s around his neck have gone from cat bell to cow bell. He’s not happy with us, but the birds say thank you…by shitting on our washing.

Kite’s, the new in thing!

Grandpa also got the kids kite’s for Christmas. It took a few days of nagging and waiting for wind but we finally got them up.

Did you know, that a box kite that get’s let go on a very windy day can go a very long way all on it’s own??

Well, we do now! Dexter’s simply ended up over the fence in the back ground. But when Jaxon did it, the thing nearly went over the school with no sign of dropping. If Daddy hadn’t jumped on the string at the very last minute, we may have lost it!

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Boats and Spiders

Grandpa gave the boys a boat each for Christmas. So we went down to the local dam and gave them a whirl.

Well, one of the boats got stuck in some weedy stuff. So I suggested Tim go and get a log to pull it out.

The log he got to do this with was very large. The end he decided to put in the water was the heavy end. I innocently told him it would be easier to put the lighter end in when I noticed there was a MASSIVE spider on the end of the log.

This thing was huge!! And it was NOT happy with me!

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Happy Birthday Mum!

Before I start sharing photo’s of our absolutely fantastic holiday to Darwin I must first remind you WHY we were going in the first place!

This woman…


Happy Birthday Mummy! You’re the most beautiful woman I know!

Thank you for our experience.

Love, *US*

The following photo is an example of why two year olds and camera’s with a 2 millisecond lag from when you push the button to when it TAKES the photo do NOT mix! Dexter WAS in the photo when I pushed the button!

Darwin One

I know, I didn’t even put up the last Darwin photo’s!

Here are some from this little trip we took. The weather was MUCH nicer. We might even go as far as saying it was awesome.

Our first little venture was to the Aquascene fish feeding.

That massive fish, and many other statues about the Aquascene venue were hand carved by the man who started feeding the fish years ago. They are glorious!

Like Brother…like brother??

But not quite right??

These photo’s clearly happened years apart.

The one on the left displaying Jaxon at his lowest moment in his third year of life. Being busted emptying a bottle or two of baby powder in his room while unsupervised. Tim and I both remember clearly that when we went in trying desperately not to laugh at what he had done he started pointing here and there saying “I hurt myself here, here and here, and I wet my pants”

The one on the right, taken not three hours ago is Dexter’s handy work. Possibly the highest point in his second year of life. See the proud look on his face?? Know what he said when we growled at him for doing it?? “DOUG DID!” DOUG!”

Dougie Dumbass

Yep. That’s Dougie’s Surname.

He is the perfect, shining example of a well behaved dog on lead. He sits, drops, stays, sits back up, stays and turns and all this other stuff most of your dogs will never know the meaning of. He’ll even come on command. But you let him off that lead and it’s almost as if you disappear! Especially if there is food or Lucky about.

Anyway. Somehow, despite all of his puppy floors, I love him. And I love training with him of a Saturday afternoon. Where I get to be proud of him and show off a little because 1) He is a stunning looking dog and 2) he is exceptionally good on lead.

Well, about three weeks ago we participated in what the club call’s a Fun Day. I had no idea what that actually meant, but it sounded like FUN and they did a sausage sizzle. Who could refuse hey??

Of 47 dogs in our class (level 1) Dougie and I came Third. Oh how I wish we had come first. But alas, we shall need to try harder. Or release rabbits for the 46 other contestants! We were graduated to Level 2 that day and given a pretty white ribbon to hang on the wall.

Level Two has been interesting to say the least. Being that Dougie just does not like men, or strangers. My new trainer walked by a few times. Offered food a few times. And Dougie seemed very content to take that food and give a little tail wag. But when that same trainer tried to demonstrate a move with Dougie, who is very good at said move compared to the other 10 dogs in our little group, things didn’t quite go to plan.

At first, Dougie was fine. He walked along, heeling as he would normally do. And sitting when he was told. But then!! Dougie LOOKED UP. And if he could have talked he would have said “WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU AND WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY MUMMY!?” Because two seconds later said male trainer was holding on to Dougie’s lead for dear life as Dougie tried to escape him, doing circles around and around him like a little puppy merry go round.

Anyway. Here are some Fun Day Photo’s. No matter what any one else thinks, I am proud of my dog, proud of the training I do with him and proud that we came third.


Dexter has come a long way since grandma’s visit. I swear, it was like having Mary Poppin’s sweeping through to sort his grumpy stubborn and screaming little ass out.

Dexter has been a nightmare for us to cope with for months. He’s been refusing to talk or communicate in any other way than screaming for a long time.

If he was hungry while I was trying to cook he would be hugging on to my leg screaming about the terrible pain and suffering he’s going through.

If he dropped something he would stand and cry about it instead of doing the normal thing and just picking it up. If you run in to the wall on your bike don’t scream at it to move. Reverse your bike and go a different way!

Tim and I were at our witt’s end when Mum got here. We’d tried everything everyone had suggested. We’d looked up and followed advice from the google people by searching “Why is my 2 year old always screaming at me?”

Desperate times, desperate measures. Have major surgery, Mary Poppin’s to the rescue!

Mum swooped in and whipped him in to shape. She basically taught me how to deal with almost every thing that he’s doing. And possibly given him a new annoying trick!? What’s with the powder on the hand thing?

Tim and I now seem to be figuring Dexter out more and he’s laughing more than screaming.

I can not thank my Mum enough for what she has done. This is the third time she’s dropped everything in her own life without being asked and sacrificed her own needs to come and look after my family because we desperately need the help at short notice.

I don’t think there’s anything I could say or do to express our gratitude enough.

Birthday Parties…oh no!

Jaxon has been pretty popular for Birthday parties this year. And unfortunately for us, as the year went on the parties got more FUN!

The last was at a Hungry Jacks.

Jaxon is planning his birthday party now.

I think he’s invited all of his class mates. All of his teachers. All of his grandparents. Kids from his kinda. Kids he may have heard while in my womb.

I should have started saving for this years ago. I don’t know how it’s going to go down when we tell him he will need to pick and choose who he wants to keep numbers down.

He’s doing maths in school. I think this might compute, but may not seem like a fair equation!

Sad Good Bye’s

There is a big hole in my heart and a few tears on my cheeks because I just said good bye to my Mummy after having her here for three glorious (ha!) weeks.

I can’t thank her enough. I can’t express my gratitude in 500 words or less with foot notes. My only hope is that one day, when you need me, I can be there for you like you are always there for Tim and I.

You are the mother I aspire to be for my children.

Safe trip back home to Darwin.

Your eternally grateful daughter,




Morning walks with Dougie

Since returning home from hospital life has been all about me trying to get the perfect balance between laying down, getting plenty of exercise and using my sore back to figure out what I can and cant do.

The most enjoyable time of my day is at about 6.30 in the morning when I get to take Dougie for a walk alone. It clears my mind. I chat to Doug about my many problems and he wags his tail. That makes me happy.

I take him to a big open field around the corner and let him off. While he runs circles around me pick up the scent of hare or fox.

I watch the sun come up and tben mozey on home. Doug and his happy tail and happy to see you nature are the best thing before the cbaos starts at home. I feel a new routine on the way.






I’m fairly sure.I’ll be fone to continje Saturday dog training next week.


Spinal Surgery and Beyond

I’m home from hospital now. A full 9 days now.

My experience was amazing! How odd is that? I just had a vertebrae in my lower back removed and it was amazing!

This is Tim taking photos of me trying to appear calm. Five minutes and it all started happening!

I could not fault the staff and medical team on my case. I didn’t wait longer than 15 minutes to be called in. And when we did they had us so busy answering questions and signing my life away, that I wasn’t nervous at all. I was completely calm through the needles and gas. That lasted 10____9____8___7_____________(3 hours later) __________ recovery room.

These are my sexy compression stockings. Despite them being totally unatractive they’re also really nice to wear!! The ones with the orange lines on it are like a blood pressure machine for your legs. Evert 3_5 minutes they would automatically bmow up and put pressure on your legs BUT they alsi VIBRATE!?!?

The drugs!! That first 12 hours after any operation are THE BEST hours ever!!!

Foggy from the anesthetic. High on morphine. You want to talk but you really just want to be moaning ” yeah man, trippy”

Without a word of a lie I believe it took me more than four hours to write my first status update. I kept passing out mid typing only to startle awake an hour or so later with my finger still resting on the last letter i had typed. My hand still holding my phone in position. It would take me ten minutes to clear my head enough to figure out what i had been trying to say, would figure out what i had to continue with and pass out again. Or post incoherent replies.

The food wasn’t so bad i had Tim bring me nothing. Normally i just get him to bring me Macca’s.

My three nurses were pretty cool. One of them we called my *happy* nurse (aka. Very obviously gay) was so awesome. He joked with me all day and we gossip and shared chocolate. Ill really miss him! When i went to say good bye to him he gave me a quick gay hug and said “Thanks for the chocolate sister”

I was out of bed within 12 hours of the operation. Walking about. I’d been begging to get out of bed for hours over night but i wasn’t allowed to get out until the physio’s came.

I was incredibly surprised at how little it hurt. I fainted after four steps after my c-section with Jaxon. That’s a pain Ill never for forget. I expected far worse for this. But it wasn’t as bad as i feared.

Now by that I don’t want you thinking this was a walk in the park. Oh! My! God! It was pretty darned awful. By

day two i was getting snappy at them because they said I’d be controlling my pain with a clicker thing. Apparently i was dealing with the pain this trauma to well to warrant anything other than panadol. Nothing they gave me really entirely worked. I could walk quite well without pain but laying down was and still is an interesting experience. Sitting is not the best experience either. After 4 minutes i feel like i might be skewed through my lower back with a burning hot metal stake.

On the Wednesday afternoon the physio’s had cleared me to go home. They got me a shower chair which is handy and gave me tips about how to use the pain of this op to slowly change my lower back with posture. If i start hurting while I’m bending, I’m doing it wrong.

Here on day nine I can last hours without any pain killers and sometime only need panadol. Im very stiff and can’t even lean much less bend and can’t swivel either. Or lift more than one kilo for the next 3 weeks. Night time’s are by far the worst for pain. I can last about four hours of painful rolls and uncomfortable positions. Then i have to move to the couch with 22 pillows to get comfy.

So far i have no regrets. Everything has gone to plan and Im recovering in line with whits expected. All i need to do now is fully relinquish my roll as Mummy to Grandma. Its hard to see your house run smoothly by someone else leaving you un-needed. Grandma, i have discovered has some very good parenting tips.

I’m so happy Im not in unbearable pain. That nerve pain. Nerve pain only occurs when Im over doing it. So when i have it i need to get up for nothing but toilet and meal times. And for chocolate. Im thankful i can still walk and that now i can take Dougie for a walk around the block without having my foot feel like a brick with numb toes and an achilles heal that could be being twanged all day.

Im glad that the pain isn’t so bad. Its only a tiny bit worse than any pain Ivee had before but THIS time i know it will get better.

And thank you Mum! Im going to build you the nicest granny flat one day so when you need me to care for you like you’re doing for my family right now you’ll feel right at home. You’re amazing!!!

(quick thank you to Unique for having Jaxon for us all week. LIFESAVER!)

Fun Fun Fun!

If you’re ordering where I am, take a quick look at this video.

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Needless to say I am shitting myself. Terrified. I’m worried about everything, From the wait to go in to surgery. Worrying about Tim sitting alone waiting for me to be announced as OK. About the kids who are just about to have their worlds thrown in to chaos. About recovery and not being able to lift the kids or help much with them or around the house for quite some time.

And I’m kind of having trouble concentrating on anything. Sleep is alluding me. And I’ve eaten a block of chocolate. The chocolate helped. A bit.