So me!

So Jaxon plays this stupid game called Five Nights at Freddy’s. Today I told him that when I was growing up we had a Freddy and he was much scarier than anything from his FNAF’s. Jaxon disagrees with me and the competetive in me just wants to sit him down one night to watch A Nightmare on Elm Street. That’d show him!

Tim says this could be child abuse. But one day Jaxon. One day you and I have a date!

How to make a balloon sword.

Step 1) Make a kind of crude looking penis with cock rings at the bottom!

He doesn’t eat them. He just moves them around. Only my shoes mostly. I can’t tell you how many mornings I have gone to put my shoes on only to find that one is missing. Having to ask the dog where your other shoe is when you really need it to go out is no laughing matter!

Because Garfield on the TV is such a huge threat to the family. Dougie Dumbass is always on guard.

Jaxon having his MRI to see if his neck needs surgery.

The theory being that it’s possible that one side of his neck is growing while the other fused side is not. They will compare these scans to scans they took last year to find out.

Tim is jealous because Jaxon gets a TV at the end of his bed. There is a mirror above his head and he’s watching a movie. No such special treatment for poor old Tim.

All of the parks that we frequent have special names. We got to one called The Eiffel Tower” because it has a big climbing thing that looks like it.

This park is called “The Blue Park” because all of the equipment is blue. But Tim and I call it “The Windy Park” because there could be not a breath of wind at home and it’s blowing a gale at this park just a few kilometers away.

For *my* birthday this year we decided to take the kids to Monster Jam. Our Saturday nights have been a treat for them lately, getting to stay up late to watch it with us. By late I mean, like a full half an hour past bed time. But they didn’t know that!

The day was awesome. Though Jaxon was a crank for the first bit of getting to see the trucks up close and personal.

See that child smiling in the photo? Yep, not mine! Some other lucky parents had a kid who was delighted to be taken to something so BIG!

The day improved once we got to our seats. Kids cheered up. 

The trucks did not fail to deliver a show.

This last one was a back flip that we’d been waiting for all day. It happened so fast that we nearly missed it!

The between show of stunt bikes was far more exciting I think. The next big thing we take them to will probably have to involve those.

Mexxi got bitten by another dog and he nearly tore her jaw off.

The vets had to remove most of the bottom half of her jaw and a lot of teeth, so now her tongue hangs out.

Now we call her Mexthi.

I’d love to say that the cat is a genius and is sitting in this pot to keep warm in the sun. But in all likely hood, he’s sitting in this pot planning the mass destruction of the local sparrows.

In the last few weeks he has gone from never catching a thing, other than the odd moth, to bringing in all kinds of things. Amoung them, two pigeons, two canaries, two budgies and a starling.

The bell’s around his neck have gone from cat bell to cow bell. He’s not happy with us, but the birds say thank you…by shitting on our washing.

In 3d…

Poor Jaxon. This happened almost as soon as we got to the camp grounds. Now we have a large bag of mozzie repelling wrist bands to go on him, as well as soaking him in Aerogaurd.

Take a close look at this photo.

There’s something not quite right about it.

Grandpa also got the kids kite’s for Christmas. It took a few days of nagging and waiting for wind but we finally got them up.

Did you know, that a box kite that get’s let go on a very windy day can go a very long way all on it’s own??

Well, we do now! Dexter’s simply ended up over the fence in the back ground. But when Jaxon did it, the thing nearly went over the school with no sign of dropping. If Daddy hadn’t jumped on the string at the very last minute, we may have lost it!

Still practicing.

Since getting our dog clippers I’ve managed to give Dougie two hair cuts.

It’s time consuming. With a night of brushing. A night for bathing. Another night to brush again, and then clipping.

Here he is before and after

Before I start sharing photo’s of our absolutely fantastic holiday to Darwin I must first remind you WHY we were going in the first place!

This woman…

TURNED SIXTY!

Happy Birthday Mummy! You’re the most beautiful woman I know!

Thank you for our experience.

Love, *US*

The following photo is an example of why two year olds and camera’s with a 2 millisecond lag from when you push the button to when it TAKES the photo do NOT mix! Dexter WAS in the photo when I pushed the button!

There are so many more photo’s, but I pushed something here, said yes or maybe no to the wrong thing there, and poof! Gone were most of my uploaded photo’s. It’s late, I’ll try again tomorrow!

I know, I didn’t even put up the last Darwin photo’s!

Here are some from this little trip we took. The weather was MUCH nicer. We might even go as far as saying it was awesome.

Our first little venture was to the Aquascene fish feeding.

That massive fish, and many other statues about the Aquascene venue were hand carved by the man who started feeding the fish years ago. They are glorious!

Another crazy day of Groodle Fun! Our biggest turn out yet. 20 dogs and 40 + people

Well, I haven’t POSTED for ages. That doesn’t need to be said.

But I have been writing. I have been blogging and writing about our lives on my tablet since my very last post here in November.

I will get around to getting them here. I just have to figure out how.

Happy Thirty Fifth Birthday to my Darling Husband!

Walking in to the chemist Where we’re quite fond of jelly beans they sell there. Can’t think who he might get that from…??

He says to me “Mum can I get jelly beans because I can smell them”

Um. No. Good try.

Despite my spinal surgery I have been able to walk. I can’t do much else but I CAN walk!!

This is once again, at the new school at the end of our street. Dexter is very keen to grow up. Even though we’ve told him about bill’s.

Jaxon has been pretty popular for Birthday parties this year. And unfortunately for us, as the year went on the parties got more FUN!

The last was at a Hungry Jacks.

Jaxon is planning his birthday party now.

I think he’s invited all of his class mates. All of his teachers. All of his grandparents. Kids from his kinda. Kids he may have heard while in my womb.

I should have started saving for this years ago. I don’t know how it’s going to go down when we tell him he will need to pick and choose who he wants to keep numbers down.

He’s doing maths in school. I think this might compute, but may not seem like a fair equation!

I gave Dougie his summer cut.

Here he is incredibly cool. He’s got the hair thing going on. He’s got the ‘MEH, I’m too cool for school’ expression down pat.

And here is my slightly girly dog who can still manage to be incredibly cool with this doo.

I’m home from hospital now. A full 9 days now.

My experience was amazing! How odd is that? I just had a vertebrae in my lower back removed and it was amazing!

This is Tim taking photos of me trying to appear calm. Five minutes and it all started happening!

I could not fault the staff and medical team on my case. I didn’t wait longer than 15 minutes to be called in. And when we did they had us so busy answering questions and signing my life away, that I wasn’t nervous at all. I was completely calm through the needles and gas. That lasted 10____9____8___7_____________(3 hours later) __________ recovery room.

These are my sexy compression stockings. Despite them being totally unatractive they’re also really nice to wear!! The ones with the orange lines on it are like a blood pressure machine for your legs. Evert 3_5 minutes they would automatically bmow up and put pressure on your legs BUT they alsi VIBRATE!?!?

The drugs!! That first 12 hours after any operation are THE BEST hours ever!!!

Foggy from the anesthetic. High on morphine. You want to talk but you really just want to be moaning ” yeah man, trippy”

Without a word of a lie I believe it took me more than four hours to write my first status update. I kept passing out mid typing only to startle awake an hour or so later with my finger still resting on the last letter i had typed. My hand still holding my phone in position. It would take me ten minutes to clear my head enough to figure out what i had been trying to say, would figure out what i had to continue with and pass out again. Or post incoherent replies.

The food wasn’t so bad i had Tim bring me nothing. Normally i just get him to bring me Macca’s.

My three nurses were pretty cool. One of them we called my *happy* nurse (aka. Very obviously gay) was so awesome. He joked with me all day and we gossip and shared chocolate. Ill really miss him! When i went to say good bye to him he gave me a quick gay hug and said “Thanks for the chocolate sister”

I was out of bed within 12 hours of the operation. Walking about. I’d been begging to get out of bed for hours over night but i wasn’t allowed to get out until the physio’s came.

I was incredibly surprised at how little it hurt. I fainted after four steps after my c-section with Jaxon. That’s a pain Ill never for forget. I expected far worse for this. But it wasn’t as bad as i feared.

Now by that I don’t want you thinking this was a walk in the park. Oh! My! God! It was pretty darned awful. By

day two i was getting snappy at them because they said I’d be controlling my pain with a clicker thing. Apparently i was dealing with the pain this trauma to well to warrant anything other than panadol. Nothing they gave me really entirely worked. I could walk quite well without pain but laying down was and still is an interesting experience. Sitting is not the best experience either. After 4 minutes i feel like i might be skewed through my lower back with a burning hot metal stake.

On the Wednesday afternoon the physio’s had cleared me to go home. They got me a shower chair which is handy and gave me tips about how to use the pain of this op to slowly change my lower back with posture. If i start hurting while I’m bending, I’m doing it wrong.

Here on day nine I can last hours without any pain killers and sometime only need panadol. Im very stiff and can’t even lean much less bend and can’t swivel either. Or lift more than one kilo for the next 3 weeks. Night time’s are by far the worst for pain. I can last about four hours of painful rolls and uncomfortable positions. Then i have to move to the couch with 22 pillows to get comfy.

So far i have no regrets. Everything has gone to plan and Im recovering in line with whits expected. All i need to do now is fully relinquish my roll as Mummy to Grandma. Its hard to see your house run smoothly by someone else leaving you un-needed. Grandma, i have discovered has some very good parenting tips.

I’m so happy Im not in unbearable pain. That nerve pain. Nerve pain only occurs when Im over doing it. So when i have it i need to get up for nothing but toilet and meal times. And for chocolate. Im thankful i can still walk and that now i can take Dougie for a walk around the block without having my foot feel like a brick with numb toes and an achilles heal that could be being twanged all day.

Im glad that the pain isn’t so bad. Its only a tiny bit worse than any pain Ivee had before but THIS time i know it will get better.

And thank you Mum! Im going to build you the nicest granny flat one day so when you need me to care for you like you’re doing for my family right now you’ll feel right at home. You’re amazing!!!

(quick thank you to Unique for having Jaxon for us all week. LIFESAVER!)

If you’re ordering where I am, take a quick look at this video.

Needless to say I am shitting myself. Terrified. I’m worried about everything, From the wait to go in to surgery. Worrying about Tim sitting alone waiting for me to be announced as OK. About the kids who are just about to have their worlds thrown in to chaos. About recovery and not being able to lift the kids or help much with them or around the house for quite some time.

And I’m kind of having trouble concentrating on anything. Sleep is alluding me. And I’ve eaten a block of chocolate. The chocolate helped. A bit.

This may look like a normal little boy eating a dry weat-bix.

Until i tell you he’s eating it with tomato sauce!!!